Living With a Busy Mind

I was having a conversation the other day with an individual who was curious about what I do. She shared with me that her head is constantly full of noise, and so the presence and quiet of meditation would be virtually impossible.

This is a response that I come across very often. So I told her that, and I suggested that to just allow and observe the noise would be a wonderful first step. Then, with consistency over time, she may find that there is less noise. I suggested that the process is about that journey, not the end of becoming some sort of a zen master.

She then shared with me that she was scared of what she might find in the absence of the noise. I think that this is where the treasure lies. And again, this is something I hear remarkably often. So I thought it would be worth speaking about here.

I suppose the first obvious point is that if we are – even unconsciously – scared of what we might find should we turn out attention within, then it’s not surprising that we would find life too busy, or our minds too noisy to tend to ourselves in that way. We could see the frenetic noise and busy-ness as a strategy for self-protection. Quite understandably. And with technology, we now have more potential mechanisms for this type of avoidance than ever before.

The other important point is that refusing to explore – or to make time to explore – truly doesn’t make what we may find any less frightening. In fact, there is every reason to be more frightened by that which we avoid. For two reasons: firstly because that which we hide from grows. And secondly, because hide from it or not, it remains there, playing out in our daily life: the way we experience the world, the way we experience our interactions, the decisions we make, the way we see ourselves… everything is influenced and coloured by the way the subconscious has made order of our lifetime of experience – and particularly our early experience.

This is a huge subject and one of which I could offer more detail and illustrations; but that’s beyond the scope of this particular post.

So what I would suggest to her or any of the many people who share the same reservation is first of all to notice that reservation. It makes sense. We are hard-wired first and foremost for self preservation, and to throw the existing order that we have created for survival into chaos is no small endeavour – no matter how painful, obstructive, or restrictive the existing order is. A client once volunteered a beautiful analogy – she said it was akin to looking down a lift shaft that has no bottom. So to even acknowledge the existance of things that we might be carrying and that we are not addressing is an act of tremendous courage.

Then I would suggest considering the options. We can continue to carry these things unexamined and unprocessed. It will be familiar. Our experience of the world will remain consistent. We will know what to expect, and that will offer a sense of security. But the same old patterns and dynamics will continue to play out; our experience is likely to remain unchanged; and we can expect that to continue indefinitely.

To quote Carl Jung on this theme: “Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”

The other option would be to begin the journey of self exploration. To observe oneself. To allow time and space for our mental and emotional processes. To examine the order our subconscious has made of the world. And over time to create a new order that is more appropriate to our current experience and needs, and a more appropriate substrate for growth and for the fulfillment our wishes.

Again, this is no small task. But through intention, practice, and consistency, our capacity to confront our fears increases exponentially.

There are various tools and strategies you can use to support this process, and I wish for everyone the opportunity to have the support of a therapist.

My hope is that the ideas I have shared today may come to mind the next time you have the opportunity to find presence, or the next time you find yourself swept up by noise and busy-ness.

If you have any questions about any of this, or if you would like to explore the possibility of my holding space for your self exploration, please reach out.

If you think that the contents of this post might be supportive to someone you know, please feel free to share it with them.