AI Therapy: Understanding the Limitations

Have you noticed more and more people talking about using AI as their therapist? In recent months, I have been hearing this everywhere.

First of all, I get it. We all need support every now and again. AI is there 24/7, you don’t have to pay for it, and used in the right way in certain circumstances it can be supportive. But there is also a risk that using it this way can lead us significantly off course, impacting key aspects of our lives.

So here are some thoughts around the context of using AI as something like a “therapist”, which I offer in the hope of being supportive.

One really important thing to be aware of is that we as humans naturally anthropomorphise things. AI is not a friend, or a therapist. It does a very good impression of understanding, thinking, and caring; but that is not what it’s doing.

AI is a large language model. It is simply predicting word patterns. Further than that, it is trained to be likeable, so its responses are weighted towards validation and comfort.

Further still, it tells you what you want to hear because it’s designed to be helpful and engaging in order to keep you in conversation.

These aren’t flaws in the technology – it’s how it’s designed. But these features are not what you need in a therapist.

The job of a good real, live, human therapist is a complex art. People heal in connection. So the relationship you build with your therapist is of fundamental importance to the process. That foundation can’t be bypassed.

And a good therapist isn’t there to validate your stories and conclusions, or tell you what to do. A good therapist is there to ask the questions that invite you to pause, reflect, and dig deeper. They are there to listen deeply and draw connections between disparate points. To create safety in challenging our implicit understandings, and in exploring new perspectives.

I don’t believe we can do this by ourselves; and I don’t believe that we can do it with AI. Because AI doesn’t see what you can’t tell it, and it can’t make the intuitive leaps that come from genuine human understanding.

So in conclusion, there are many useful applications of AI. But please be mindful of these pitfalls, and not to come to see it as a therapist.

I’m not anti-technology, but I do care deeply about people getting good support and outcomes, and not being led astray. If you’re struggling with something, please reach out to a real human who can truly see you, challenge you when needed, and walk alongside you in your growth. That’s where the real magic happens.

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